This exercise raises awareness and gives practice in listening not only to the facts in a conversation but also to the feelings surrounding the facts. It is particularly useful for a team who is planning to do a listening survey.

Procedure

1. Divide into groups of 3. Each group letters themselves off – A, B and C.
2. A is asked to speak for a 2 - 3 minutes on a topic that they have strong feelings about e.g. something they feel angry about, or feel very excited about. While A is speaking, B listens to the facts of what A is saying and C is listening to the feelings A is expressing.
3. B gives feedback to A on the facts heard; C gives feedback on the feelings heard. ‘A’ responds saying whether or not the feedback is accurate.
4. The exercise is then repeated with B speaking and with C listening for facts and A listening for feelings. Feedback is again given.
5. Finally C speaks and A listens for facts and B for feelings. Feedback follows again.
6. Each triad discusses how the exercise was for them, what they learned from it and whether it was easier to listen to facts or to feelings..
7. The whole group comes together and there is an opportunity to share the insights participants had during the exercise. If it hasn’t already been covered it may be useful for the facilitator to ask “which did you find it easier to listen to, facts or feelings?” Most people have an ease with one over the other, so it is useful to draw out any insights participants may have on the implications of their preference, and the part they are least comfortable with.

Time 1 - 11/2 hours